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ToDaY I ReAliSeD SoMeThInG WhIcH BliNd Me FoR LoNg

Monday, March 21, 2005, 10:56 PM

Finally, today i realised that why am i so stupid? why am i always blaming my bros for not being there for me? that becuz i have nv been there for them b4. i have nv been there when they are down. im always trying to act strong, act as if im fine. im such a failure. thought i can put on a mask, hide all my feelings from them thinking that i would not be a burden to them. i was completely wrong! i did even tried to get into their world. im always being so selfish! why? i thought i know them very well but its like i only know their skin not their flesh n bones. its like eating an apple skin with its flesh, it bitter! i dun like this kind of feelings. i hate it. bros, if u can hear me, can u forgive me for wad i have done? being such a selfish me. dan, syl, kenny, cal, bian, derek will u guys forgive me? i wanna go back to the past where i have all my bros around me, with melissa by my side, annabella as my god sis. all i want is a time reverse! all i ask for. why ppl always get wad they wanted, why cant i? am i the chosen one to be like this? guys, can u all forgive me for wad i have done? i dun wanna be so strong infront of u guys anymore. pls, forgive me!